


The Death of Me

by CaptainZ



Category: The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Attempted Rape/Non-Con, F/M, Multi, Spy Stuff, darcy overreacts sometimes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-08-14
Updated: 2014-03-14
Packaged: 2017-12-23 11:12:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 11
Words: 9,859
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/925704
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CaptainZ/pseuds/CaptainZ
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Darcy had had her fun with Jane and had been put out to pasture for her own safety. But what happens when a battle between two super-soldiers and two massive spy-powers catches her in the middle of a deadly game? Will she play it safe or risk it all?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Her life was an endless cycle of bad to worse to better to bad again. She had accepted this as a part of her life, but the long periods of time between worse and better were getting longer and more complicated. School, work and responsibility had become her life. It was as if there was no more Darcy... Only Zuul... meaning, work and boring adult life. Darcy was almost twenty-two and her life already felt like it was slipping away from her.

Darcy was pretty fresh out of high school when her parents decided that it was time for her to become independent while attending college. With the usual “Back in my day....” and “When I was a kid...”, she got an apartment, a job, and a car and started a life of her own, free from her parents.

A knock at the door had disrupted Darcy’s train of thought as she had started to unwind from today’s workday. K.C’s had been a nightmare with the big sale day and a million customers asking if coupons worked or not on certain items.The entire day had been a cycle of ringing up one unhappy customer after another and it had finally started to wear on her after hour six. Plus, having a second job at the research department at the military base wasn’t any help.

Darcy worked in the top secret labs ten stories below the regular base. She thought it would look good on her transcripts and they were looking for college kids at the job fair. Since she worked with Jane, Darcy had become accustomed to SCIENCE!, but wanted to be on the more medical/life-saving kind of science side. Due to her previous lab experience, Darcy sped up the ranks pretty quickly. Darcy was a lab assistant/gofer/intern to the division working on cures for cancer and HIV. Nothing new. They had a running joke in the lab that it was the next ‘super-soldier’ formula and that with the human trials, they’d create the next Captain America. 

That guy had suddenly made an appearance from the great beyond and with him came allies that protected earth from aliens and tyrannical demigods. They were called the Avengers according to the news and they definitely caught her attention. They went off radar, but Darcy researched them as much as she could. Not much, but a start.

In fact, keeping up with all the super-heroics had become a hobby of hers. She didn’t know how to explain it, but she felt invested in their welfare like she had with Thor, only now her bubble had expanded. Darcy kept tabs on the Fantastic Four, the X-men, the Ghost Rider, Daredevil, and the new Spider-man in New York. Her only excuse was it kept her out of trouble on weekends.

Darcy missed the easy going days of her and Jane riding around in the desert, looking at the stars. Life was simpler back then. She missed Jane. Erik. The stars. Thor.   
After Jane was whisked away to Norway, Darcy had been sent home to California to live in ignorance until the Avengers happened and even then she had to keep her trap shut because of all the forms they made her sign. 

Little did she know, Darcy’s life was about to get a whole lot more complicated.

Darcy came home, took off her shoes, and logged onto the computer when the wretched knock came to the door again. She huffed and pulled herself out of her spinning chair and made her way to the door. She opened it without thinking and was confronted by a group of scary looking thugs in matching track suits. Darcy shut the door as quickly as she opened it, but it was all too easy for them to just break it down and suddenly the apartment was filled to the brim with them. 

“Vhere do you think your going, leetle girl? You’ve got information ve vant and ve’re not leaving ‘til ve get it, understand? In fact, ve’re just going to take you vith us.... got it, bro?,” the leader grabbed her painfully by her hair and dragged her outside into the parking lot. 

These guys sounded like Dracula, but looked like gym rats. Darcy didn’t know whether to laugh or be completely terrified. She went with terrified since they were in the process of kidnapping her for no apparent reason. 

“Please, what are you talking about? What information? I’m just a sales associate!,” Darcy tried to play off as innocently as she could. Maybe they would think they got the wrong person. 

“You are Darcy Lewis, yes? Then you are right person, bro,” one of the other thugs reasoned.

“Hey, boss, she pretty... Can I have her after ve get the information?,” another thug leered at her. The leader grunted in the affirmative and was still dragging Darcy by her hair when he stopped abruptly. She looked up to find a figure blocking them from the unmarked SUV’s she assumed they were going to use.

The leader released her hair, but put her in a choke hold facing the figure and a gun to her head. The figure pointed a gun at her captor and said simply, “She’s mine. Give her to me.”

The figure was tall, muscular, and his long brown hair made him look like a stark contrast to the slobby looking tracksuit Draculas Darcy was surrounded by. His face was mostly obscured by a mask and goggles that covered his eyes and lower half of his face. The goggles were looking straight at her.

“HA! You vant her. Come get her, Vinter Soldier. You are just a ghost story, bro!,” the leader glared back and shifted his grip on Darcy. 

“With pleasure...,” The Winter Soldier replied and before she could blink, the eight tracksuit Draculas were dead. Bullet wounds to their foreheads. Darcy was just wondering why she wasn’t on the ground with them, surrounded by a puddle of her own blood.

“Stay calm and this will all go smoothly, Miss Lewis. I’d rather not have to kill you,” the Winter Soldier holstered his gun and stepped closer to her. Something in his voice was too icy to be trusted so she stepped back at his advance.

“Don’t you touch me! Stay back, you crazy-cut sociopathic mass murderer!,” Darcy grabbed the gun that the tracksuit leader still had on him and pointed it at the Winter Soldier.

“You’re brave, Miss Lewis, I’ll give you that. I’m glad that I have orders to keep you alive. It would be such a waste to kill someone who would challenge me,” he pulled out a syringe from his back pocket and put his hands up in mock surrender, “Plus, you’re cute when you’re angry.”

Darcy had just about enough of his patronizing and shot first so that she could ask questions later. She shot him in the left shoulder, but the bullet sounded like it hit metal and ricocheted. Before Darcy could get another shot in, he was running towards her at full speed. 

Her fight or flight reflex kicked in and she ran in the other direction. There was no way she was going to let this idiot kidnap her in broad daylight.

Before she could get thirty feet, the Winter Soldier grabbed her arm and stuck the syringe through her Hulk t-shirt. She waited for the pain of a poison or toxic drug, but all she found was darkness.


	2. Travelling

This mission was different. From the beginning of what he can remember of his existence, he’s only been given one purpose; to be the angel of death to whoever his handlers wanted dead. 

James had never had the opportunity to take a victim alive. Alive. That was a scary word for him. What would the Winter Soldier, the most feared of the Cold War assassins, be doing kidnapping a live girl? 

Apparently his mark had been working under the scientists creating the next super-soldier serum at the nearby army base. She had managed to memorize enough of the formula to be useful to his superiors and now she was the weakest link in the chain. 

This girl, Darcy Penelope Lewis, 23, born an only child to Mr. and Mrs. Marcus Lewis in december of 1990, was going to be the make or break point for a secret war between SHIELD and General Lukin that’s been going on for decades. James was merely a middle man. 

But his superiors weren’t the only interested parties to want a girl with access to the new super-soldier serum. HYDRA, AIM, as well as Fisk, and Madame Masque had sent operatives to obtain the girl. And they were persistent. He killed more AIM agents in one afternoon then he had in 5 years. Just for a girl to live in blissful ignorance a while longer until the moment was right to take her.

But what was so interesting about the whole affair was that the supposed ‘good guys’, SHIELD, had left this girl utterly defenseless. She wasn’t even on their watch list. Either they were completely ignorant of her role or they didn’t deem her enough of a threat to be taken seriously. Or they were setting a trap. She was just bait.  
And like bait, James watched her warily day and night for two months, learning her habits and her deepest thoughts. 

She was fairly normal. Smart. Funny. Engaging. And loved. Darcy would call her parents every night and visit friends often. She was a curvy brunette thing with bad posture and plain, pale features. Her hair was too wild, her eyes too deeply set, and her teeth were stained. She wore glasses and drooled in her sleep. Her vices were lemon frosting, macaroni and cheese, and bad television. She was about as uninteresting as it comes. But to him, she was perfect. Normal. The only extremely remarkable and unique thing about her were her ever changing blue/green eyes. One moment, they were a calm and caring sea blue, the next, a dangerous, flashing green.

James found on her computer that she was fascinated by the Avengers and kept tabs on all the news articles that featured them. Superheroes were her secret passion. She kept an eye out for all of them almost as if she were trying to protect them. She worried for them.

He had finally found her weakness... Darcy cared too much. She was vulnerable because of her compassion and maybe that could be an excellent way to break her for the information she possessed. 

James dutifully reported back to his handlers and they gave him his orders, “Get her tomorrow.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I'm posting this from my tumblr so I'll try to keep posting every week or so!!


	3. Car Ride from Hell

Darcy woke up in the back seat of one of the SUV’s the tracksuit Draculas had before they were slaughtered. Instantly she bolted upright to see if the Winter Soldier was still there and to curse the gods for not making it one of her nightmares. 

He was there, unfortunately, driving God knows where. He seemed completely engrossed by the road that it startled Darcy when he asked her if she was hungry. After the initial shock, Darcy nodded a ‘yes’ and he pulled a ding dong out of the glove compartment and handed it to her over his right shoulder. 

“I thought you meant real food, asshole,” Darcy hissed as she took the ding dong and was tempted to throw it at his head if she wasn’t so afraid of him crashing the car and killing them both.

“We’ll be reaching a town in the next few hours, doll face. Don’t you worry your lovely butt about it.” Was this psycho trying to flirt with her? Darcy fought her gag reflex long enough to choke down the stale ding dong and grumble about how she needed to use the bathroom. 

“Why don’t you catch up on more of your beauty rest? We’ll be there before you know it,” he spoke so calmly that Darcy had a hard time not believing him. So after a few minutes of passing unfamiliar and yet eerily similar scenery for about forty five minutes, Darcy drifted back to sleep in the back seat.

The second time Darcy woke up in the back seat of the SUV was because she was being nudged awake by a cold metal object. She sprung up in shock and shivered from the cold that she suddenly felt. 

Her eyes were bleary but she made out the Winter Soldier’s form as he covered his bionic arm and uncovered his face. What she saw next made her do a double take... His blazing blue eyes looked back at her and his mouth turned down in a concerned frown. Some people would call him gorgeous, but Darcy would call him All American and dangerous. Nothing Russian about this guy. 

“Staring is rude, girly,” the Winter Soldier warned as he put on a heavy leather jacket and gathered his fake ID’s, “We’ll be staying here tonight. The Starlight motel seems like a good place to recharge.”

Darcy got out of the car and found herself in the parking lot of a crappy little motel off of the main highway. She processed everything as she wiped her eyes and clung to her light sweater. 

“Here. Make yourself useful,” the Winter Soldier threw a duffle at her and she managed to catch the heavy bag with an ‘Oof’. 

“What’daya got in here? A bazooka?,” Darcy ground out as she followed him to room 16 on the first floor. He looked back at her and gave her a creepy smile, “And more, sweet cheeks.”

She shivered again and his smile grew wider. They entered the sparse room and turned on the light. The light didn’t help brighten up the room and, to Darcy, it smelled like old people and mold. But the worst part was that there was only one bed.

“OH HELL NO!,” Darcy bellowed and dropped the duffle to the ground with a muffled thud. “I am NOT sleeping anywhere near your murdering, kidnapping ass. You better be sleeping on the floor, creeper, ‘cuz this dog won’t hunt,” Darcy was going to stand her ground on this one. 

“You’ll do as instructed or I have no choice but to start taking off fingers. Besides, I don’t sleep with my targets,” the Winter Soldier looked her up and down and considered her, “Unless they look like you...”

Darcy wanted to bash his arrogant brains in with the weapons he was putting out onto the small desk the motel provided. She took a step towards the open door while he picked at his guns. “I wouldn’t run, moye solntse. It would only make me very angry and you very hurt,” his eyes cold in intensity and his voice even. She eyed the door one more time in desperation and hope, before she noticed the Winter Soldier inch towards her to place himself between the door and her. 

“Who are you? What do you want with me?,” Darcy stepped away from him and further into the room. 

“I--- I don’t know....,” he replied, looking around confused for a moment. He seemed disoriented almost.

“What do you mean you don’t know? You kidnapped me for a reason! What is it?!,” Darcy was losing her schooled control over her emotions. She really didn’t want to end up on the news and put her parents through this. She didn’t want to be here with this crazy, gorgeous assassin. She wanted to be home with some ice tea, her kitty, and her computer. And an enormous amount of lemon frosting and cookie dough.

“I mean that I can’t remember why I’m here... Why I attacked those guys... Why I took you... It was important, but it’s fuzzy right now... I can’t concentrate....,” the Winter Soldier had a pained expression on his face like he was trying to move something with his mind. Darcy came slowly closer to him.

“Are you okay, Winter Soldier guy? You don’t look so hot...,” Darcy put a hand on his shoulder and looked into his ice cold blue eyes. For once, she could make up some warmth in those eyes and it gave her some hope. Maybe this guy was brainwashed and if Darcy was persistent, she could cure him of it...

“James... my name is James...,” the Winter Soldier looked down at her, still fighting his programming. 

“Well, James, I need you to fight harder against whatever they did to you. You need to fight your killer instinct...,” Darcy sounded hopeful and James looked hopeful.

But something in the back of James’ mind snapped back into focus and pushed his good side back into the shadows. His programming rebooted itself. Darcy could see him visibly relax and she was starting to get excited, like seeing the light at the end of a very dark and very long tunnel. But it was all for naught.


	4. I'd Kill for Your Love

The way she looked at him, the compassion and lack of pity, almost as if she understood where he was coming from, suddenly it struck a chord with him. He needed her, but more importantly, he wanted her.

Before Darcy could say another sentence, he pushed her back onto the bed and pinned her arms to the headboard, effectively trapping her underneath of him. She yelped, but was silenced by his weight on her rib cage. 

She squirmed beneath him and gasped in frustration as he tried to find his way to her lips. Suddenly, Darcy pulled her head back and snapped her neck forward to collide her forehead with his. James released her arms and fell off the bed. 

She rushed for the bathroom and locked herself in. After he recovered from her head-butt, James went to the bathroom door and pleaded for her to come out, “Darcy, please come out. I was just joking...”

“You come near me again, rapist, and I’ll slice you from nose to naval, you understand?!,” Darcy bellowed in return. 

“I very much doubt that, little one...,” he countered. After about ten minutes, James was getting tired of the stalemate.

He broke into the bathroom with a swift kick and found her brandishing one of the his large knives. Her terrified and yet completely serious expression caught something in his gut and he held his hands up in surrender. 

“I’m not going to harm you, moye solntse. I don’t know what came over me. Now, please, return to the bedroom and we’ll talk about it,” he said as gently and as calmly as he could.

She looked angry now that he was talking to her like a child and she was going to have none of that. Darcy lunged at James with the knife and managed to catch him off-guard and sliced open a part of his human arm.

James managed to block out the pain, grab her arm, and wrench the knife out of her hand. He grabbed her around her middle and carried her back out into the main part of the motel room. Darcy fought like an angry cat, clawing at him and spouting curse words that would make a drunken sailor proud. He threw her onto the bed and she sprung back at him. James blocked her attack and fought the urge to snap her neck.

He had put the sleeper hold on her in an attempt to get her to calm down before she woke one of their neighbors. This girl was going to be the death of him. After a few moments, she had stopped struggling and went limp in his arms. 

Picking her up, Darcy was light as a feather and finally calm. She was right about him. He did want to take advantage of her. James wanted to feel her breath in his ear and the soft, vulnerable skin of her neck under his lips. To trace the lines of her body with his hands and to dig his fingers into her hair as he tasted her lips. Her fire ignited something in him that he hadn’t felt since... well, since his beloved Natasha. James wanted to protect her and love her and keep her away from the world his programming was dragging her into. But it was already getting to be too late. James wished that Darcy had never memorized the new super-soldier formula. He wished he had never met her.

He laid her on the bed, removed her shoes, socks and pants. She thankfully wore mostly modest lace boy short underwear or else his urge to be on top of her may have taken over again. Through her shirt, James undid her bra and wrangled it out from under her shirt without revealing too much. He was not going to become irrevocably attached to Darcy. 

He rolled her name over and over again in his mind as he tucked her in and stripped down to his underwear. James rolled into bed behind her and draped his bionic arm around her warm middle. He pulled her close against him and took in the floral scent of her hair and skin. She smelled like jasmine, roses, and butterfly bush. 

James decided that if he wanted to kiss her, now would be the time. He moved her hair away and planted a light kiss to the pulse point on her neck, feeling her steady heartbeat beneath his lips. Feeling life instead of death was exhilarating. He trailed the kisses to the exposed skin of her shoulder and back up to her cheek again. It was nice to have a real, breathing, warm body to lie next to. To hold and enjoy. It was some semblance of a what a normal life would feel like.

James found a place on the very back of her neck to suck and ended up giving her a hickey that he prayed she wouldn’t notice the next morning. 

She must be revolted by him. He killed and kidnapped and almost raped people. It was a miracle he was stopped. The terrified look in her eyes is what truly made him want to stop.

James was a monster, plain and simple. And as he took one more look at Darcy while she slept peacefully, he discovered she was the Beauty to his Beast. Except he knew that this mission would not have a fairy tale ending. As soon as his handlers got the information from her, he would have no choice, but to extinguish the life he fought to protect. The life of someone he loved.


	5. The Black Widow

Natasha glanced at the screen, not quite believing what she was seeing. The man she had thought would never see the light of day again was now back. The man she once loved more than anyone or anything in the world. 

Natasha admits to herself that she was young and easily enthralled back then, but even now the incorruptible Black Widow had the shivers. She hadn’t had the shivers since the Hulk nearly killed her. It was something or someone special that made her react that way.

SHIELD had gotten intel on a secret military operation to reinvent the super-soldier serum and all clues pointed to Dr. Foster’s former intern, Darcy Lewis. Foster had long since been remounted to New York to work with Banner, Selvig, and Stark on getting Thor back. Jane had thought it wise not to get her favorite intern involved.

Darcy had managed to get hand-picked for the research team and was the only accessible member. A target had been painted on her back. It was Natasha’s job to keep the lowest of profiles and tail her. But when she found who else was interested in Darcy, everything seemed to change.... Her past had come back to haunt her. 

James, the Winter Soldier, her former lover, was now back from the dead and about to stir the pot that Natasha was smack dab in the middle of. This was something she was not prepared for.

Natasha called back to Fury who, sounding as surprised as her, ordered her to let the girl get taken and to follow them back to whatever base that he had been sent from. Natasha did as she was told, but was relieved when she found out she was going to be getting back up. She hoped for the newly returned Coulson who understood her history with James and would be able to handle the situation accordingly.

With Clint, Natasha’s new lover, it would be a mission clouded in jealousy and betrayal. Clint would probably end up getting them all killed and blowing the entire operation. 

But to Natasha’s dismay, Steve was chosen to meet her at a local motel and keep an eye on Darcy and her captor, the Winter Soldier. Steve was as close to the Winter Soldier as she was and it wasn’t going to be easy to convince him that this might not be his childhood friend anymore. Since he had been defrosted, Steve was kept away from any intel regarding the Winter Soldier for the sake of his mental health. Steve had been too mentally fragile and, to Fury, had yet to prove himself. 

Now that Steve was there, apparently all the missions that Fury had sent him on now made him qualified for this particular one. But Steve would only regret this one. James was no longer James Buchanan Barnes. This was a killer and a kidnapper. He was no longer human by most people’s standards.

And yet, there was always hope.


	6. The Super Soldier

Steve wasn’t looking forward to this mission. He had heard terrible and horrifying stories about the Winter Soldier that didn’t make Steve want to meet him anytime soon.  
Working with his friend and teammate Natasha, was the only upside to this whole assignment. They would supposedly be tailing a kidnapped girl who had valuable information on a project that was incredibly similar to the one that had turned him from zero to hero.  
It wasn’t until he was holed up in the Starlight motel that he learned that she was Dr. Foster’s former intern, Darcy Lewis, and how important it was to keep her safe. He also saw how beautiful she was. Her curves and pouty lips seemed to speak volumes to him. The candid pictures of her in her SHIELD file did nothing to calm the butterflies in his stomach or the flashbacks to the pin-ups he and the other soldiers loved to admire. Darcy was perfect and scared out of her mind by the looks of it.  
Steve couldn’t believe SHIELD and Fury had let her get taken. She was an innocent in the wrong place at the wrong time. Weren’t they supposed to be protected from people like the Winter Soldier?  
He and Natasha were in one of the rooms above Darcy and the Winter Soldier, unpacking and coming up with logistics on who got the first shift to watch the screen that was fed by the camera hidden within the room below them. Steve couldn’t make out the grainy features of the Winter Soldier now that he had his mask off, but something was oddly familiar about him. The way he walked and the sound of his voice.  
Steve wrestled with the placement as he watched Darcy try to inch her way out of the room only to be blocked by the Winter Soldier. Steve wanted to run down and get her out. This had gone on too far already. They couldn’t count on the Winter Soldier to keep Darcy in one piece, even with her being so valuable an asset.

Natasha eyed him with a warning glare that had him thinking twice about releasing the breath he was unconsciously holding on to. She grounded him and he kept her in check. That was the extent of the relationship between Steve and Natasha. They respected each other too much to be anything otherwise.

Steve turned his attention back onto the screen as Natasha cleaned her guns. The Winter Soldier was now looking around the room confused and disoriented. Darcy was trying to console him for some reason and he muttered something that Steve barely caught over the tiny speakers in the screen.

“James.... My name is James...” The camera focused on the Winter Soldier’s face for the moment it took Steve to recognize him.

“Oh my God....,” Steve breathed out before jumping to his feet like he had been electrocuted. He turned to Natasha who had stood in a defensive stance, clearly taken by surprise, “You... You knew, Natasha?... Fury knew... WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME?”

Natasha looked slightly taken aback but recovered in seconds, “It was need to know, Steve. You were just being defrosted when we found out. You needed to recover from that before you got hit with your childhood friend being a brainwashed assassin working for the Russian government.”

Steve could read the sincerity in her voice, but the tearing in his gut made the betrayal feel all the more real. Steve looked down at the screen just in time to see Bucky slam Darcy to the bed and climb on top of her. Darcy was struggling and he could hear her gasps in surprise and frustration. James was going to rape her. Steve had to stop it.

Steve ran to the door, grabbing his shield along the way, and was almost through it when a hand grabbed him by the scruff of the neck and dragged his ass back into the room.

“You can’t face him like this, Steve. Darcy just barricaded herself into the bathroom and James will know better than to attack her a second time. She’s safe for now. We have to let them lead us back to whoever is behind all this. And that’s when we can get Darcy, James, and Bucky back,” Natasha reasoned as she sat Steve down on the edge of one of the beds. Her green eyes pierced him and yet Steve still had some fight left in him.

“He was going to rape her, Natasha! I wasn’t going to let that happen. Darcy is an innocent. I have to protect her,” Steve stared her down until Natasha added, “Darcy is also an adult woman, Steve. She can protect herself. She went up against Thor and won. I know what she’s capable of and I know she’s smart enough to get out of anything thrown at her. Give her a little credit, Steve.”

“Then what happens when we have to intervene? What if she can’t fight back?,” Steve needed to know the limitations to what he could do for Darcy to keep her from the Winter Soldier aspect of Bucky’s personality.

“Then we do everything in our power to protect Darcy. She’s too important an asset to lose on a mission like this one. If and when Darcy can’t fight back when the Winter Soldier or anyone else attacks her, then we have the green light to intervene,” Natasha reasoned and Steve detected a little emotion at the root of Natasha’s look.

Natasha seemed to have some personal connection to Darcy and it made Steve feel better that he wasn’t the only one concerned about Darcy’s well-being. Steve replaced his shield in its hiding place and went back to his seat attending to the screen.


	7. Good morning, sunshine

Darcy awoke the next morning to find herself curled next to a slumbering Winter Soldier. Her eyes widened as he drooled into his pillow and instinctually pulled her closer to his chest which was like a wall of fire/body heat.

She looked down to see he was mostly naked and she only had a shirt and panties on. Her breath caught in her throat as the Winter Soldier slowly opened his eyes and stared at her. And then he smiled. Something warm and kind, completely opposite from the cruel line it had been the night before.

“Good morning, beautiful,” he stroked her cheek with the pads of his metallic fingers and it gave Darcy flashbacks to last night when she momentarily felt those same fingers clutch her throat and were tempted to snap her neck. James must have sensed her discomfort and read it as having to be sexually motivated because he assured her, “Don’t worry, sunshine, I didn’t compromise you last night. Unless you count spooning you a majority of the night.”

“You tried to rape me last night,” Darcy says bluntly. It seems to slap James awake because he takes his hand off of Darcy and pulls the covers off of himself. He stands and pads over to his clothes and belongings. 

Darcy can’t help but notice the scars and burns that litter his otherwise perfect skin. His abs and arms are so cut that she’s pretty disappointed that a guy that gorgeous is a bad guy. Darcy would even overlook his bionic arm if his personality matched his roguish good looks. 

Darcy suddenly pictured the only guy on the face of this planet that could probably make her feel safe right now: Captain America. Why couldn’t Captain America be the guy who had spooned her last night? A guy like that was the closest thing to a white knight she had ever seen and it made her sad that she was never going to see him in real life. She’ll probably end up dying at the hands of her black knight, the Winter Soldier.

Speaking of her black knight, James had ordered room service from the local diner so that they didn’t have to leave the room and risk being seen. Darcy resigns herself to watching James change clothes and slowly hide his guns so that when room service came, they wouldn’t think they were dealing with a terrorist.

“All right, honey, if you value innocent lives, you are going to act like my bubbly adoring girlfriend until they leave and then you can go back to hating me all you want,” James warns her as she makes an effort to get out of bed and get dressed.

“Drop dead, creep. If it wasn’t for those innocent lives, I’d try to gouge your eyes out with a spoon while I ate my Lucky Charms, got it? Stop trying to be cute or funny. We all know you’re just going to hand me off to be ransomed or tortured or killed, so stop acting like you’re normal. Besides, these constant mood swings between psychotic killer and lovable rogue are giving me a migraine.”

James smiled dryly and tucked one of his many hand guns away in his clothing as Darcy took a quick shower and reluctantly got dressed into her already dirty clothes.

There was a knock at the door and Darcy jumped a little at how harsh it was. James could tell how jumpy his attack last night had left her and he felt a twinge of guilt. Something he hadn’t felt in decades. 

James shot Darcy a warning glance as he opened the door to find the sunlight of the mid-morning completely obscured by the massive forms of two thugs that looked like they wanted more than a decent tip.

“Hello, Winter Soldier, we’ve come for the hostage. Give her over and you may leave this situation with all your limbs still attached...,” one of the thugs growled and backed James into the room and away from view. The other thug followed closely behind, but kept the door open.

“HYDRA command wishes to have words with you, Miss Lewis. You come with us and we can guarantee your safety and reward you handsomely.”

“Oh, so now I get a choice? Let’s see here... Handsome and handsy Russian assassin or the HYDRA terror twins with bad breath? So hard to choose!,” Darcy tried to be discrete about finding something blunt to hit this guy over the head with.

“Cute,” the HYDRA agent commented and grabbed Darcy by the arm. She yelped and kicked the agent in the shin which seemed to do nothing, but piss him off more.

Meanwhile, James studied his opponent and slyly went for the gun in his jacket pocket. “I don’t think so, Soldier. Just make it easier on yourself and give up.”

James smiled and replied, “I never was one to like the easy path and giving up is not really my style.”

The Winter Soldier flung himself at the thug and had him around the neck. With a simple torque of his arm and a sickening crack, the thug was permanently out of commission.

Darcy was still valiantly squirming her way free from the thug’s grip when a knife appeared from behind the thug’s massive form and sliced him from one side of his neck to the other. Darcy screamed as the thug’s now-blood-draining body came down on her.

Darcy felt herself get pulled out of the way and James called, “Timber!” In an attempt to make her feel better about the situation, James hugs her.

“What are you doing? Are you trying to comfort me?,” Darcy glared at him and he released as quickly as he had attached himself.

“Yes, but I see it’s wasted on you. I am reminded embracing is a widely acknowledged symbol of comfort and empathy. Thought you’d appreciate it since we almost died,” James countered and cleaned off his knife with the dead man’s shirt.

“I almost died! Not you! You’re a real son of a bitch, you know that?,” Darcy fumed as she took a seat on the bed. 

James nodded sagely, but remained silent while Darcy’s temper started to cool off, “Now what, Soldier? What do your masters want you to do with me now?”

“We move on, doll-face. We try to outrun whoever is after you next,” James says, packing up his stuff and cleaning up after himself and Darcy.

“We can’t just keep running. We have to go somewhere. Where? Tell me!,” Darcy got in his way as best as she could.

“You’ll do as I say and I’ll try to make this experience as safe and pleasurable as possible,” James extends to his full height and then quickly dips down to peck Darcy on the lips.

She seemed stunned for a moment before she glares into his very soul and raises a hand to strike him. James quickly grabs her wrist and plants a small love-bite on it. This seems to enrage Darcy further and James only laughs as she tries to hit him with the heavy phone book.

“You think this is funny, asshole? I oughtta skin you alive!,” Darcy screams and knees him in the balls, “Choke on that, you bastard!”

James, momentarily stunned, watches as Darcy jogs out of the room and out to the car. She has the keys and is about to make a serious run for it when a hand slips around her waist to stop her from getting in the SUV.

“Let me go! Let me-- I’ll--- Oh my God---!,” Darcy squirms until she’s nearly nose to nose with the white knight. 

“It’s all right, Miss Lewis, you’re safe with us...,” Captain America’s eyes stare into hers from behind his ocean blue mask.


	8. The Rescuers

Darcy couldn’t believe it. Something actually went her way in this crazy mixed up chain of events. The hero actually did come to her rescue. She could have totally handled it herself, but it was nice to have someone make you feel safe and have your back. The whole thing was a little belated, but not unwelcome.

“Thank God,” Darcy turned to him and hugged the good Captain tightly around the middle. “I thought I was going to die...”

“Not on our watch, Miss Lewis,” Cap stiffened at the first few seconds of the hug, but relaxed when he knew she wasn’t going anywhere.

“I leave you for five seconds, Doll, and you’re movin’ on with another man. And here I thought we had something special...,” James came stumbling out to them and his cold eyes gave nothing away to Steve. 

“Patriotic Pig, give the lady back and you’ll leave with only a few digits missing and maybe an eye. I don’t like it when my dates go after guys prettier than me,” The Winter Soldier slowly approached as though he was worried that if he moved too fast, Captain America would magically spirit Darcy away.

“Miss Lewis, stand behind me. You don’t need to be in the middle of this... This is between The Winter Soldier and me,” Cap slowly and gently pushed Darcy behind him and took a defensive stance. Steve didn’t know where Natasha had ended up, but he could use another pair of hands against this guy.

“Listen to me, Bucky, you can’t have her back. SHIELD now has custody over her. We’re going to bring you in too and get you the help you need. I can help you remember who you are!,” Steve announced in an attempt to reach his friend who was so deeply entrenched in the Winter Soldier that it was going to be hard to get him back out.

“Who the hell is Bucky?,” The Winter Soldier called back and Darcy could see Cap’s shoulders tighten considerably and he let out a ragged breath almost as if he was disappointed that the Winter Soldier didn’t know what he was talking about.

“James, please listen to reason.... You’re surrounded by friends who care. Remember who you are,” a female voice comes from behind the Winter Soldier and one of the most beautiful women Darcy had ever seen comes from the alley just to the side of Darcy and James’ room.

“What would you know of friends, Natasha? You’re a traitor to our country and our cause! Or was it so easy to walk away from the Red Room? Away from me?,” the Winter Soldier spits back.

Darcy can see Captain America look from ‘Natasha’ to the Winter Soldier as if he were waiting for a fight to break out and he’d have to intervene.

“I walked away because I found out who I was... I didn’t want to abandon you, but I needed to save myself before I could come back for you. And now I’m back. Come on, James... Let us help you,” Natasha stepped toward James and extended an arm as if it were some sort of lifeline.

James looked hesitant for a moment at her extended hand before his eye bolted back to Natasha’s face, “Never.”

“Then you leave us no choice, James...,” Cap steps forward and tenses for a fight. The Winter Soldier gives them a wild look before pulling out his hidden handguns and making a dash towards Cap and Darcy. Cap pulls Darcy behind his shield and then makes an attempt at handing her off to Natasha who manages to get around the Winter Soldier’s wild fire.

Natasha then goes for plan B when a wall of gunfire separates her from Darcy and Steve. The Black Widow pulls out her own set of personal guns and aims to keep the Winter Soldier distracted long enough for Steve to make a getaway. James knows this trick well, having taught it to Natasha during her training, that he goes undisturbed in the direction that Steve and Darcy are heading. 

Steve throws Darcy onto the back of his bike and starts it up before she can realize what’s happening.

“Hold on tight, Miss Lewis,” Steve commands over the roar of the engine and the gunfire. Darcy buries her face in Cap’s back and winds her arms around his chest, willing all of this to be over. As they drive away from the motel and away from the now one-on-one between the Winter Soldier and the Black Widow, Darcy feels a stinging in her right shoulder that wasn’t there a minute ago. 

She looks down to find a puddle of blood soaking through her sweater and dripping down towards the leather seat of the bike. Darcy now knows where the pain’s coming from. Gunshot. She tries her best to stay conscious and stay on the bike. She knows she has to tell Captain America, but for him she can stay strong just a little while longer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I might be slowing down on chapter updates as I'm all caught up and school is starting soon. I will keep posting though!!


	9. Hell on wheels

Darcy’s gone. One minute he was spooning her in the crappy, musty motel room and the next she’s got her arms around Captain America as he drives his bike off with her. James shoots in her direction for good measure as they make their way towards the highway.

He will get her back. It’s only a matter of time, but James will finish this mission if it kills him and Darcy.

Now James is left with Natasha. Being around her is like reliving a moment when a picture was taken. It feels like the same dynamic it was so many years ago. Her technique and grace are there just as he remembers them.

Natasha feels the same, but with a little more of the raw open-wound twinge in it. Leaving him was the hardest thing she had ever done in her entire life. Everyday she dreamed of going back for him. To save him just like the many times he had saved her. 

But times had changed and she had a new man in her life that made her feel more herself than she had felt in all the times she had been with James. Clint was something new, and someone who made her want to be a better person than she was when she was with James.

After Darcy was whisked off by Cap, James had given up on the gunfire and stared at Natasha who made no move against him.

“James, she’s gone... Please come with me. We can get you the help you deserve. You don’t have to be the Winter Soldier anymore. The Cold War has been long over,” Natasha steps towards James cautiously as he’s breathing hard and his eyes read confusion and anger.

“I don’t need help from a traitor. I’m getting her back. I’m not going to lose this time, Natasha,” James pulls out a grenade from his back pocket almost as if it were a normal thing to carry explosives there, pulls the pin and throws it in the air towards her.

Natasha glances one more time to meet James eyes, which hold no mercy for her, and then the grenade goes off as she runs for cover behind a line of parked cars.

By the time Natasha gets up again, the Winter Soldier is lost to the winds.  
\--------

They’ve made it to one of SHIELD’s many safe houses by the time Steve really starts to see the weariness settle on Darcy from one of his side mirrors.

They come to a stop in front of an abandoned factory outside of a town ironically named Hope. As he gets off the bike, he notices a small trail of red run down from near Darcy’s seat. And then he sees it. Half of her shirt is covered in blood and she’s looking on the deathly side of pale.

“S’nothing, pretty boy... Just a flesh wound,” Darcy slurs as she gingerly gets off the bike. She winces and Steve takes that as a cue to shake off his shock. How could she have made it all that way without telling him? Natasha was right, he did need to give Darcy more credit. 

“We need to get you inside, Miss Lewis. That bullet needs to come out now,” Cap scoops her up and runs to the factory like carrying her isn’t a big deal.

“You know how to take out a bullet, Dr. Captain America?,” Darcy hisses in pain as they enter the front door to find a completely modern interior that doesn’t come close to matching the exterior of the building.

“I’ve had to take out a lot in my time. I’m more worried about how you’re going to take it,” Steve sets her down on a plush couch and then runs for the extensive first aid kit specially equipped for those who can’t go to a hospital.

Darcy watches as he washes his hands in a bowl of hot water and sterilizes the scalpel, needle, and forceps he’s going to use on her.

“All right, Miss Lewis, this is going to hurt a lot, so you can scream if you need to or I can get you something to ease the pain.”

“No need, Dr. Cap, I’ll just try and stay conscious instead.”

Captain America looks down at her to give her a chance to ask for some alcohol in the cabinets or for some anesthetic from the first aid kit, but she refuses. He takes the scalpel in his large yet artistic hands and begins. Darcy initially squirms, but settles when he makes quick work of extracting the bullet. Before they both know it, Darcy’s all sewed up and resting on the couch.

“You were amazing, Miss Lewis. I don’t think anyone else could have handled that as well,” Steve washes the equipment and puts it back. When Steve came back to the couch, Darcy still looked pale and in distress. 

“It looks like you need some blood. What type are you?,” Steve came to Darcy’s side and gingerly handed her a glass of water.

“I’m not Dracula, but if you say I need blood, I’m type AB positive,” Darcy sits up and looks at him with a wry smile on her face.

Steve can’t help but take it in for a moment. She’s adorable. She looks like a pin-up from his time, but has all the flavors of a modern gal who knows who she is no matter the situation. And Steve can’t help but be in awe of someone so well balanced and true to themselves.

Steve goes for more medical supplies and brings the bag of new blood to her. He easily hooks her up and just as he gingerly lets go of her arm and starts to stand from his kneeling position, Darcy’s stomach growls violently.

Steve smiles and wordlessly gets the message to get her some food. 

“So, Cap, how’d you learn to do all of that medical mumbo jumbo on me? I feel better already.”

“I was in the army for a long time and even though we had a lot of good medics, sometimes they weren’t readily available, so I learned on the fly and took over some of their duties in the field.”

“Both brawny and brainy, I like that in a superhero... Speaking of which, how did you know I was in trouble? Did your Captain America senses start tingling?”

Steve shoots her a questioning look and debates on whether or not to tell her he’s in league with SHIELD.Would it scare her to know that she was being watched? If she could take the threat of the Winter Soldier in stride, then this would seem like a light blow.

“Actually, well-- the Black Widow and I were sent in by SHIELD to keep and eye on you and the Winter Soldier to track you both back to whoever had sent him after you in the first place. We intervened when we could tell he could no longer protect you. Darcy-- we-,” Steve began as she started to widen her eyes at every detail he revealed. Clearly he was wrong about her taking this well.

“You were there the whole time and didn’t do anything to stop that psycho from attacking me, kidnapping me, and killing all those guys? Are you fucking kidding me?! I thought you guys were supposed to protect people like me, not use us as bait! God...!,” Darcy was trying to sit up, but the pain level had her sinking back down into the cushions.

“Don’t move, you’ll tear your stitches. Please, Darcy, we would have intervened earlier, but--,” Steve gently sat down on the edge of the couch.

“NO! Captain, you had every opportunity to get me out of there! Why didn’t you?”

“Darcy we--,” Steve began, but he could see it was a lost cause, “How about we talk about this in the morning? Good night, Darcy...”

Darcy looked quickly back up at him before turning over and murmuring, “Good night, Captain.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long delayed update, work and school have been hell. I'm having some writer's block, but I'll keep on truckin' on for you guys! Thanks for all the feedback!!


	10. The Healer

Darcy felt awful. Every part of her ached and her mind was swimming with pictures of James and Captain America. They were both so different and yet they showed some of the same mannerisms, as if they had known each other in another life.

Darcy didn’t want to yell at America’s golden boy, but the fact that people she trusted were leaving her in the dark had rubbed her the wrong way. It also usually meant that they would be leaving her soon.

Her father had kept her mother’s terminal illness a secret for so long until it was already too late for Darcy to say goodbye. That was Darcy’s freshman year at Culver. But by the time Jane had gotten around, Darcy had learned to protect herself and build up her emotional armor through a series of cheating ex-boyfriends. And then Thor came around and with his vanishing act which left a ditched and heartbroken Jane and Darcy knew by the way that SHIELD was sniffing around that Jane would be leaving her behind soon as well.

That made her almost break, but then she remembered that the road so far hadn’t devoured her (and she went to public high school) and she wasn’t going to let it beat her now.

Darcy tosses a little in her fit she would call sleep. _How could James shoot me like that? How am I getting Stockholm Syndrome now when I’m with with the modern embodiment of chivalry?_

Finally she gives up on her struggle and sits up to put her pale feet on the cold hardwood floor. She slowly pads to the bathroom and blinks as the light turns on of its own accord. _Damn automatic shit._ Darcy washes her face off with some cold water as she may be getting some sort of fever. She searches the cabinets for pain meds or anything to help her get the rest she needs. Suddenly there are foot steps and she freezes, praying to the powers that be that the lesson about not moving she learned during the time she watched Jurassic Park with her dad will bail her out of this situation. Hopefully whoever it is has eyesight based off of movement.

As it turns out, a shirtless Captain America makes his debut as she slowly turns to meet his eyes.

Darcy admits that she isn’t as superficial as some of the women her age, but at that moment she forgotten her rules about extremely handsome people not being just exquisite living statues. The man before her ranks just below Thor on the holy-shit-are-you-even-for-real scale and the you’re-not-even-being-fair-raising-my-standards-on-everyone meter.

He’s got a perfectly rumpled golden bed-head going on and a light layer of sweat that has him bouncing light off his body which would put any anatomy book to shame. Darcy can’t help but swallow hard when her gaze makes it to the trail of fuzz leading from his naval down below the band of his sweats.

“Darcy, what are you doing up? Are you in pain?,” his voice makes it’s presence known and Darcy uses all of her willpower to snap out of the trance.

“Couldn’t sleep. Lots of factors are actually keeping me awake right now. I can’t think straight,” Darcy wipes her eyes and leans against the bathroom counter.

“Well it might be the fact you’re sleeping on the couch and not in a bed. You didn’t want to move after I got you in. Come on, let’s get you settled and I’ll bring you some meds,” he looked down at her and guides her to a bedroom tucked towards the back of the flat.

Darcy takes the liberty of leaning against him and his body heat makes all her troubles go away. _I don’t want to sleep alone. You’re warm and I don’t think I could part with it for a night._

“Darcy, I know you’re tired, but I don’t think that sleeping next to each other is going to help. I’ve been told I snore. A lot,” Cap says as he guides her to her bed.

“Dammit. I said that out loud?,” Darcy moans and slides under the covers.

He shakes his head and she sighs. “Fine. Go back to your stinking room. I don’t need your emotional support anyway,” Darcy grumbles.

Cap chuckles a little and puts a large hand on her uninjured shoulder.

“I’ll be back with the meds.” Darcy nods and closes her eyes.

It’s already morning when she wakes up.


	11. Where is she?

_Where was she?_ He thought as he followed a long since cold trail from Captain America’s motorcycle. She was the only thing in his life that mattered now. It was like it was physically painful to be without her now.

He remembered the smell of her hair the night before and the feel of her compassion when she helped him try to remember. The only thing he can remember now is her and she’s out there with him.

That patriotic rat bastard has his girl and they’re out there doing god knows what. When he looked into that man’s eyes though, he came up with a familiar pair from his past and the way that the Captain’s eyes twinkled when he called him that name.... _Bucky_..... It was almost as if he expected him to remember being called that.

The only other thing that James could remember about the Captain was a sense of betrayal.

_You let me fall, Steve. You sat there like the big damn hero that you are and you just let me fall._

Suddenly, James was all blinding pain, enough to bring him to his knees at the side of the road in the middle of nowhere.

_I gave you my life, Steve. And for what? To be turned into this thing? This killing thing? A thing whose only humanity lies with the girl he kidnapped? The one you stole from me?!_

Falling. It was the rush of air past his ears and the sound of his own screaming were all that he really remembered. Those feelings felt like a door opening into memories so far buried it felt like he was digging for treasure under a mountain. A door that was fighting to be closed by a shadow that he could only assume was his programming kicking in.

The programming had a voice. It urged him to relax and let the door shut and remained locked forever and to return to hunting down his prey. But James wanted to know what other memories he could find. A sudden rush of the feeling of skin on skin and the din of light laughter brought him back to a pair of girls he once brought to a fair. There were supposed to be one more to their party. Another guy. Short, skinny, and stubborn as all hell. _Where was he?_

Then, as if by a monumental counterforce, the door to those beautiful sensory memories was shut and James once again had a task set before him.

He had to find out where Captain America had taken his Darcy.

**Author's Note:**

> There are some Russian phrases peppered in, so I apologize in advance if they're incorrect!!


End file.
